


Dumb Chatfic i made years ago

by Huwulling



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Fluff, M/M, My First Fanfic, Texting, Why Did I Write This?, decided to post it here to get rid of it, wrote this in 6th grade and it never saw the light of day
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:07:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23368174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huwulling/pseuds/Huwulling
Summary: Yea so i made this in like 6th grade and i decided to post it here for no reasonenjoy this extremely random chatroom fic that will give you 2. hand embarrasmentim sorry for this-
Relationships: Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan, Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> good luck soldier

6 pm. Bonding time

angelic hair: has created a chat: Bonding Time.

angelic hair: hello

Father: what have you made Jeonghan?

fukdurmom: bro is you blind a chat

2woo: who the fuck are you guys

father: language

2woo: sorry

angelic hair: guys i made a chat cus i'm like a bridge between these two friend groups and i thought we could unite into one big group.

scraps: did this sound like a good idea in your head?

angelic hair: yes it did. you have to be apart of this seungcheol.

scraps: yes mother

booyoncé: YO LET'S INtRODUCE OURSLEVES

smol™: ourselves*

TOOSOON: GREAT IDEA

fukdurmom: g r e a t we have the caps lock people.

THE FUKIN SUN: I'M HERE TO.

Minghao: dear lord help. the chat was just created and it's already going downhill.

booyoncé: INTRODUCTIONS PLZ.

tree: hello then i'm Kim Mingyu and I'm a music major vocal line!

TOOSOON: I'M KWON SOONYOUNG AND I'M A DANCE MAJOR

Father: Hello! i'm Hong Jisoo but you can call me Joshua. I'm a music major vocal line

2woo: i'm Jeon Wonwoo. music major rap line

scraps: Hello i'm Choi Seungcheol i'm music major rap line

fukdurmom: h e l l o i'm Chwe hansol just call me Vernon i'm music major rap line  
ps. m e m e s

child: Hello! i'm Lee Chan! i'm a dance major just like Soonyoung-hyung!

fukdurmom: T O O P U R E

angelic hair: A G R E E

Minghao: hello i'm Xu Minghao and please don't google my name i'm a dance major

fukdurmom: Image

Minghao: i will kill you Chwe Hansol and i will make you suffer

fukdurmom set Minghaos name to thughao

thughao: why Vernon why

THE FUKIN SUN: HELLO I'M LEE SEOKMIN AND I'M A MUSIC MAJOR VOCAL LINE

suffering™: hello i'm Wen Junhui but call me Jun a meme loving fuck whos a dance major ps. i'm suffering send help please 

Father: LANGUAGE

suffering™: fuck

smol™: hi i'm Lee Jihoon music music major composer/vocal line

angelic hair: as you all know i'm Yoon Jeonghan a music major vocal line

booyoncé: u guys ready?

tree: please no

booyoncé:

☼ BOO ♥ SEUNGKWAN ☼  
☼ MUSIC ♥ MAJOR ♥ VOCAL ♥ LINE ☼

fukdurmom: l o r d

suffering™: how does one keep up with him?

angelic hair: meet me at love letter cafe guys we gotta meet up.

thughao: i'm not sure i wanna meet seungkwan anymore

fukdurmom: be there in ten.

-the damned cafe-

they were now all gathered and had introduced themselves were gonna do the pov thing with minghao cuz he's probably the only sane person in this thing

Minghao:  
okay that jun guy is actually pretty hot and vernon looked like he was REALLY into seungkwans ass wonwoo looks like he's about to fucking explode while he's looking at i think it was mingyu and he was blabbering about dogs so yeah but there was this look in wonwoos eyes that like shined when mingyu talked and i swear i could see jihoon was either going too kill soonyoung for flirting with him or accept it jeonghan, joshua and seungcheol was like having a love triangle or something like that i don't know Seokmin and dino were the only ones who didn't look like they were into each other which i am grateful for, for we must protect the child by all means but then we all said our goodbyes and left.

3 am. Bonding time:

suffering™: yo dudes

smol™: Shut the fuck up and go to sleep dude.

suffering™: sorry dude

4 pm. Hansolo - Seungkwan♥

Me: new phone who dis?

Seungkwan♥: it is i satan himself

Me: PURAHSIIE JESUS

Seungkwan♥: so girls or boys?

Me: well you're not gonna get a straight answer i can tell you.

Me: but i gotta say boys for that. what ‘bout you?

Seungkwan♥: Boys

Me: rainbow

Seungkwan♥: yes

Me: wait dude Minghao just asked me the if Jun is gay….

Seungkwan♥:...

Me: matchmakers

Seungkwan♥: fuck yeah 

Seungkwan♥: and yes Jun is gay like everyone else except for Seokmin he straight 

Me: same except for Chan he's too pure i think he was an asexual

Seungkwan♥: holy shit this is just fantastic.

Me: what.

Seungkwan♥: Minghao just asked me who i was talking to and i said you and he asked me to ask you if Jun was gay.

Me: holy shit that is great tell him yes

Seungkwan♥: i just did and his face is great he's blushing like someone just poured a bucket of blood on his face

Me: that was one beautiful but brutal sentence.

Seungkwan♥: thank you i have been practising it

Me: it was beautiful just like you.

seen by Seungkwan♥

4:19 pm.-Bonding Time.

scraps: does anyone know why the hell vernon just ran as fast as a ostrich out of the room?

TOOSOON: IDK BUT SEUNGKWAN JUST DIED FOR 2 MINUTES I AM CONCERNED FOR HIS HEALTH YO @BOOYONCÉ YOU GOT AN ILLNESS WE DON'T KNOW BOUT?

4:20 (may the memes live) pm.- Hansolo - Seungkwan♥

Me: shit no please don't leave me now i'm so sorry

Seungkwan♥: it's okay i know i'm beautiful unlike Seokmin

Me: okay i take it back

Seungkwan♥: no can do loverboy besides how the hell did you get that hair like??

Me: idk i just wash it with shampoo

Seungkwan♥: no conditioner?

Me: nahh dude that takes way too long

Seungkwan♥: I USE SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONER EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY AND YOU JUST USE SHAMPOO AND HAVE PERFECT HAIR HOW DID YOU DO IT

Me: i just told ya i just use shampoo

Seungkwan♥: SEND ME A PIC OF YOU AND YOUR HAIR PLEASE

You have sent an Image

Seungkwan♥: BEAUTIFUL

Me: me or my hair

Seungkwan♥: first of your hair is beautiful second you’re handsome you can't be beautiful when you're handsome keep that in mind

Me: did you just call me handsome

Seungkwan♥: maybe

Me: yo wait i think they are talking about us on the group chat

4:30 pm bonding time

scraps: do you think Vernon's even alive

Father: i'm not sure but i haven't heard from seungkwan yet

TOOSOON: NOOOO NOT SEUNGKWAN HE MUST NOT DIE NOOOO

smol™: calm down he's not dead he's just not answering

thughao: and you are aware hyung that hansol doesn't answer too 

smol™: good

fukdurmom set their name as hansolo

hansolo: r00d hyung

smol™: dammit he's still alive

2woo: why is this chat still alive

tree: cuz it's funny and i like you guys already

suffering™: the real MVP Mingyu

angelic hair: so it did work out after all i thought i was going to be sent to hell because of this

Father: you are never going to hell you're too pure

angelic hair: thank you

Father: (in english cuz everything else is supposed to be korean) you're welcome!

hansolo: (e(=sign for english)) wait you speak english?

Father: (e) fluent

hansolo: (e) FINALLY SOMEONE WHO SPEAKS FLUENT ENGLISH

TOOSOON: YEAH CAN YOU SWITCH BACK TO KOREAN PLEASE CUZ SOME PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND ENGLISH

booyoncé: let them have their moment soonyoung

booyoncé: and that moment is over now BACK TO KOREAN PLEASE

THE FUKIN SUN: YO GUYS SINCE IT'S FRIDAY SOONYOUNG DOING MOVIE NIGHT YOU GUYS COMING?

booyoncé: YES

hansolo: if Seungkwan’s going i'm going too

thughao: since i got nothing to do i'm coming

suffering™: vroom

THE FUKIN SUN: IS THAT A YES?

suffering™: yes

TOOSOON: I'M COMING! WHAT ABOUT YOU JIHOON?

smol™: i'm trying to finish this song so i don't think i can make it

TOOSOON: BUT WHAT IF I COME TO YOUR STUDIO AND DRAG YOU OUT OF THERE?

smol™: then i will murder you

TOOSOON: OKAY THEN JIHOON WILL BE COMING TOO

smol™: go fuck yourself Kwon Soonyoung

TOOSOON: I WONDER HOW MANY TIMES THAT HAS BEEN SAID TO ME?

scraps: i will be coming 

angelic hair: will be coming too!

tree: me and wonwoo are coming too

2woo: ok

THE FUKIN SUN: SO YOU ARE ALL COMING?

hansolo: yes and why do you and soonyoung always write in all caps?

THE FUKIN SUN: CUZ SOMEONE *LOOKING AT SEUNGKWAN* MESSED AROUND IN OUR SETTINGS

TOOSOON: STILL WANT TO KNOW HOW YOU DID IT

booyoncé: I'M SORRY OKAY AND I DON'T KNOW HOW I DID IT EITHER

angelic hair: i have chosen shua and cheollie to come help me pick a outfit.

Father: but why us

angelic hair: because you're both handsome all the time so stop asking questions and come help me

child: are you telling me i'm going to have two dads and one mom

booyoncé: *whispering in the back* i ship iiiit.

thughao: can't say i don't agree but i can't say that i disagree

5:02am- Vernon - Joshua (e)

Vernon: hey Joshua can i talk to you about something?

Joshua: yes of course

Vernon: i think i like Seungkwan but i'm not sure

Joshua: do you feel like you want to be close to him a lot and just have him by your side?

Vernon: yeah i guess i do

Joshua: there's the answer

Vernon: wow was it really that simple?

Joshua: yep

Vernon: you're a great advice giver you know that?

Joshua: i get told a lot

Joshua: i have to go Jeonghan keeps asking me what shirt he should wear i bet i look just as dead inside as Seungcheol

Joshua: he says i do gotta go.

Vernon: see ya

-at Jeonghan’s apartment-

“Stop texting and help me here shua!” “i agree very much you look dead inside right now josh”  
Seungcheol said “can you two stop texting and help me here what shirt looks best?” he said as he held up two shirts one a red sweater with a bunny that said ‘don't be sad!’ on it and another plain white dress t-shirt “i think you look good without one” Seungcheol whispered to himself but unfortunately Joshua heard it but he didn't comment on it for the sake of himself and seungcheol and just gave him a knowing look and seungcheol turned red “i think you should take the white dress shirt it would look good on you” Joshua said as he was trying to save the conversation and it worked “what do you think cheolie-hyung?”

“i think you look good without one”....

“it was at this moment Cheolie-hyung knew.”  
“he done fucked up.”   
it came from Joshua.

the two men and the feminine man were silent for a moment before Joshua broke the silence  
“i can't say i disagree with Seungcheol-hyung” “you know you're not making this better Joshua” Jeonghan said “this conversation is beyond repair” Seungcheol broke in “but you would look good in that sweater now that i think about it” Joshua looked at Seungcheol and he gave Joshua an approving look and nod “he would look pretty cute in it i must agree” “okay so before it was the dress shirt and now it's the sweater can you guys make up your mind?” Jeonghan said “i think he should take the sweater do you agree Seungcheol-hyung?” Joshua looked at Seungcheol “yes i agree you should put on the sweater” “so it's gonna be the red sweater?” he asked them “yes” they answered. Joshua looked at his phone to see what the clock was 5:30pm “hey i think we should be going now” “probably should” Seungcheol said “just so you guys know i'm not gonna pretend this didn't happen” Jeonghan said “dammit” Seungcheol said under his breath while they were walking over to seokmin and Soonyoung’s apartment.

-Soonyoung and Seokmin’s apartment-

“EOMMA HAS ARRIVED!” Jeonghan shouted as they walked into the apartment “do you need to shout” wonwoo asked. he was sitting on the couch next to mingyu who was blabbering about dogs which scared wonwoo but he still listened, true love right there. Looks like Vernon was there and was looking pretty eager for something idk what ‘must be seungkwan,’ Joshua thought just as the three men sat down they could hear screaming from outside “must be Soonyoung and Jihoon Hyung” Chan said. and boy was he right “I SWEAR TO GOD, KWON SOONYOUNG YOU ARE DEAD MEAT ONCE YOU LET GO OF ME!” “wait oh no i like meat but i don't want to let go either” he said as he opened the door we got to see a soonyoung with a bloody nose carrying an angry jihoon over his shoulder and i swear Minghao broke down in laughter so here is what is happening; Mingyu is babbling on about dogs to a frightend Wonwoo while Minghao is breaking down in a fit of laughter with Chan because of the fact that Soonyoung carried Jihoon all the way over here with him over his shoulder and Jeonghan, Joshua and Seungcheol are flirting back and forth while Vernon is sitting in the corner on his phone waiting for Seungkwan to arrive.

in other words:

we’re off to a great start

5:48pm bonding time

hansolo: guys hurry the hell over here it's a pure clusterfuck

suffering™: 

hansolo: you calling this hell an empire. hurry i beg

-Jun and Mingyu’s apt.-

“SEUNGKWAN HURRY THE FUCK UP WE'VE BEEN HERE FOR A HOUR WERE SUPPOSED TO LEAVE NOW!” “JUN CALM YOUR TITS I'M DONE NOW, NOW WE CAN GO!” “FINALLY!” jun screamed as he ran and got his coat he looked at the clock.

5:50pm.

they were supposed to be there at 6pm.

“WE HAVE NO TIME TO WASTE LAZY, WE GOTTA GO NOW OR WERE GONNA BE LATE SEUNGKWAN YOU HAVE NEGATIVE 3 SECONDS TO GET READY” jun screamed starting to panic but just as he finished shouting, seungkwan came and they both ran like fucking lamborghinis i swear they were fucking fast it took them 5 minutes to get there while it normally took 13 minutes and literally kicked open the door “ARE WE LATE?!” jun screamed upon entering the apartment they gazed upon the clusterfuck in front of them when the only sane person Vernon came up to them “nope you made it just in time” in a calm tone.   
this, children, is only the beginning.

-end of chapter one of Bonding Time-

BONUS!!:

TOOSOON: YO I'M COMING TO DRAG YOU OUT OF THAT STUDIO

smol™: you do know that those caps lock are incredibly annoying.

TOOSOON: WELL WHAT CAN I DO ABOUT IT

TOOSOON: I'M OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR OPEN UP

smol™: front or studio

TOOSOON: STUDIO

smol™: how did you get in?

TOOSOON: I PICKED THE LOCK

smol™: WHY WOULD YOU PICK MY LOCK YOU ASSHAT

TOOSOON: HOW ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO GET IN?

smol™: ASK ME YOU IDIOT

TOOSOON: OH

TOOSOON: OPEN THE DOOR

smol™: WHY WOULD I, I DON'T LIKE SOCIALIZING.

TOOSOON: I WILL PICK THE LOCK JIHOON

smol™: don't you dare pick the lock to my studio i will burn you and your entire family.

TOOSOON: DAMN DIDN'T EXPECT YOU TO BE SO VIOLENT BUT I WILL NOT HESITATE

smol™: ARE YOU PICKING THE LOCK RIGHT NOW

TOOSOON: NO OFCOURSE NOT I WOULD NEVER DO THAT

smol™: YOU FUCKER

as the text was sent Jihoon smashed the door into Sooyoung's face “well hello to you too Jihoon” Soonyoung said checking if he had a bloody nose which he did “you motherfucker why are you even here and how did you get my address?” “okay so first of i'm here to drag you over to seokmin and second i got you're address from hansol” “that brat”

“i swear you BROKE INTO, MY apartment!” Jihoon said as he helped Soonyoung with his bloody nose “what's the big deal hyung? all i did was open your door an-”  
“STAY STILL OR I'LL STICK THIS PIECE OF PAPER UP YOUR ASS!” he said as he tried to put the little piece of paper in his friends nostril “well you could have not opened the door so aggressively” he said while trying to stay still “i swear i do not regret anything” Jihoon answered him Soonyoung just laughed “hey! i told you to stay still!” “i'm sorry but it's just you look so cute when you're angry”  
Jihoon’s face turned a pinkish blood red “don't you flirt with me Kwon Soonyoung” “well i just did” Soonyoung said as Jihoon was done with his nose “well let's get to this so called movie night!” Soonyoung said sounding very excited looking back at Jihoon “oh i think not i have a song to finish so don't mind me and please show yourself out” Jihoon said pointing at his front door “well if i can't drag you i'm going to have to carry you!!” “what the-” he was cut of by a Soonyoung lifting him and throwing him over his shoulder “YA WHAT IS THIS SOONYOUNG YOU BASTARD!” Jhoon shouted as he was carried out of his apartment but at least Soonyoung closed the door so that was kinda the only positive thing about it oh wait there's one more thing:

he wouldn't see Jihoon blushing like a wildfire

i am extremely sorry for this pain you have gone through please take this cookie as a sign of your bravery and persistance


	2. Ok hear me out

Ok so this got way more positive response than expected, i might fuck around and write a chapter 2 at some point. Y'all who read this kinda gave me a confidence boost in my wacky writing to try and finish this so shoutout to you guys it made me feel really happy that someone actually enjoyed it :D

I wrote the first part of this in like 6th grade to escape my other assignments but I'm actually going to try and make something that's not completly crap and straight out of hetalia 2013 fanfiction.net looking so please bear with me I'm not a professional :))


End file.
